Apart but yet together, a different love story

On V-Day, couples separated by distance plan movies, chat over phone, exchange gifts

Abhijeet (24) is madly in love. On Sunday, which is Valentine's Day, he will watch a movie with his beloved Pallavi. They will watch the same movie and enjoy the same cuisine but at different places-- he in Pune and she in Nagpur.

Many like Abhijeet and Pallavi, who are in a long-distance relationship, are determined not to spend this special day for lovers alone despite not being together. Instead, they have figured out how to enjoy the day "together".

Media professional Meghna (25) whose boyfriend Gaurav is studying in the US said, "I have asked a friend to order some authentic Indian food and deliver it to Gaurav's place. He loves desi food like fish curry and biryani. Through this small gesture I want to remind him how much I love him."

Online gifting sites always come handy when your loved one is in a far-off place. Riddhi (22), a public relations associate, will be gifting her boyfriend in the US flowers and chocolates. "Valentine's Day is synonymous with such gifts for your loved ones. I want him to enjoy them there even without me around, yet remember me," said Riddhi, who has planned a wine and cheese dinner with her friends.

Kaizad Bhamgara has sent a gift package containing chocolates, a card, love letters and soft toys to his girlfriend Shirley in California. He plans to spend a lot of time with her on the phone on Valentine's Day.

Love-struck Santosh Rao (23), a software trainee, will surely miss girlfriend Sonia on V-Day, but will make it special for her by sending her one of his T-shirts that she liked. "I will mail her the same shirt to show my love for her," said Santosh.

Harbinder Singh in Nigeria will make sure that his girlfriend Jeeya will be the first person he sees in the morning. "I will chat with Jeeya through the web cam in the morning and also gift her a pair of shoes she had spotted on a website," he said. His day will also end talking to her on the phone "till they fall asleep".

(Some names have been changed)

-Published in DNA, Pune on February 14, 2010 on the back page.

Odissi keeps this octogenarian going

For 85-year-old Ritha Devi, an acclaimed Odissi exponent, dancing is her only God and passion. Ritha Devi had to separate from her family and husband, but that didn't keep her away from her passion.

"In the late forties, when I was first exposed to dance, it was not considered decent for a girl from a good social background,'' said Ritha Devi, at a workshop she was conducting at the University of Pune.

Her father, who worked in the administration of the state of Baroda, opposed her dancing and stopped funding her higher studies. "When my father was posted in Shillong, I was exposed to Manipuri and my guru was Howbom Athomba Singh. I was the first person to perform Manipuri solo,'' reminisced Ritha Devi, who is the great granddaughter of noted Assamese litterateur Lakshminath Bezbaruah and the great grand niece of Rabindranath Tagore.

After her marriage, she continued learning dance -- Bharatnatyam in Chennai and Kathakali in Mumbai. Despite the opposition from her husband and the subsequent separation, Ritha Devi was determined to pursue her passion. But it was after an Odissi performance she saw, she knew that this was the dance form she should pursue and dedicate her life to. "Odissi was not known to people outside Orissa in those days. The grace and the sculpture like postures of the dance form really impressed me,'' said Ritha Devi, who taught dance in New York for over a decade.

She learnt Odissi from Pankaj Charan Das and specially, called him to Mumbai to teach the dance form to her. Pandit Ravi Shankar suggest Ritha Devi's name to various institutes in Europe and she gave many performances in European countries thereafter. She resided in New York for three decades and shifted to India in 2003.

Odissi is a dance form addressed to Lord Jagannath and a traditional Odissa sari stitched like a dhoti and silver jewellery is worn while performing it. "In ancient India, the Mahari Odissi dancers, which literally means great woman, were considered sacred and were respected. But when the Mughals came to India and destroyed the temples, these women were forced into prostitution. That's how later on, dancers were looked down upon,'' said Ritha Devi, who worked towards reviving and dignifying Odissi.

When asked what keeps her going, she said, "I love dance and that love keeps me going. I practise for three hours a day. It is the perfect exercise.'' She performed the Panchkanya-- tragic stories of five women-- Ahilya, Draupadi, Tara, Kunti and Mandodari, for four hours in Mumbai in 1971. "I was the only one to perform the Panchkanya,'' she added.

Ritha Devi feels that classical dance teaches one the right postures. "In Pune, Kathak is more popular because of the influence of Hindustani classical music,'' she reasons. She advises aspiring Odissi dancers to have knowledge of the great Indian epics -- Ramayan and Mahabharat. "You need to know the scripts in order to bring out the emotions in the performance,'' said Ritha Devi, who resides in Kalyaninagar and conducts dance classes at her residence.

"Dance has no age restrictions. Anyone who loves dancing can pursue it,'' she added.

Photo courtesy: DNA

-Published in DNA, Pune on February 14, 2010 on the city features page

FYI

Hi friends, Now that I am working with the Pune DNA, which unfortunately doesn't have any e-link, I have to share some of my good articles that have appeared here through my blog. :)

Why lose hope? There’s a bright future ahead….

The recent spate of suicides has got me thinking. Young students are hanging themselves and others who share similar feeling are following suit. I thought about the whole thing and reflected on my own childhood- the childhood that I had is so different from what kids have today.

I was in school till just eight years back and suddenly things have changed so much. I see my cousins, nieces and nephews under tremendous pressure- pressure to perform, excel in studies and in extra-curricular activities too. Reason – fierce competition, to make to college, to get an admission to a course you want to, to meet your parents’ expectations. Such a young mind and so many tensions. And then we see weaklings who can’t take it anymore, taking extreme steps.

I think the reason could not having a proper dialogue with the parents. The not sharing of what you are feeling and what you want to be with them. When I was kid, a lot was expected out of me, but I was never pressurized. I got to do what I wanted. I could tell my parents whatever I had in mind, and I still do so. So much so that I told my mother I was seeing someone in the first month itself!

We were not used to the computers and other electronic gadgets such as playstations, video games, mobile phones etc etc. we believed in face to face interaction with friends rather than chatting online or over the phone. We played games ourselves, and not through some electronic joystick or keypads. Those were the days when we enjoyed complete freedom and made choices regarding career very late in life i.e. in the 12^th std. now kids have to decide what they want to become as early as in 5^th or 6^th.

Both parents have started working and also thanks to the growing trend of nuclear families, there are no grandparents around, also there is a trend of having only one child. All this put into one, makes the child feel lonely, pressurized and vulnerable to such acts.

The solution lies in increasing face to face contact with people, socializing, having a good family environment and not getting defeated easily. Parents should not force anything on their kids and give them a freedom of choice.

I hope in the coming days the suicides stop. All that I can say is RIP….the souls who have committed the greatest mistake of their life which has taken the gift of life away from them….halfway.

Goodbye Noughties

Okay…I admit that the headline is copied from our DNA’s special issues. But I kinda liked it. Today we are going to bid adieu to the 2000-09 decade. This decade will always be very special to me as I spend my teens, my young adult days. I passed my SSC, HSC, I graduated, post-gradated and started working in this one decade! Phew…too many things have happened in these ten years and here’s a year-wise lowdown of them all.

2000: The year when Hritik Roshan became popular thanks to Kaho Na Pyaar Hai and we got a new actor to have a crush on. This year was the last year of my school, so the whole year was spent in filling scrapbooks, performing at the last annual days and sports says and clicking photographs with classmates and teachers. Then there were of course the scary board exams that were fast approaching and the cut throat competition to stand first in school. The year was the ‘innocentest’ in this decade.

2001: Time to finish school and join Junior College. Board exams went on peacefully, without much copying and cheating and now time was to decide what stream to join. As a bright student the obvious choice was science. And also because of the fact that I liked the subject, the only hitch being Maths and Physics- but just because of Biology and Chemistry I decided to take up science. Results were out and I missed a place in the Fergusson College by 0.2%. But then aamcha Modern College was not a bad choice. The feeling of entering a college was a bit eerie for me as I used to watch too many films and colleges were portrayed very wrongly in the 1990s chaap movies. But slowly I got accustomed to the setup and started enjoying my life.

2002: A very normal year for a Junior-Collegiate. Lectures, practicals, katta, jokes, PJs- we did it all. I missed (again) a seat to the ‘scholar batch’ of my college and had to satisfy being in the F division (the second best division). This is the year when I realized my love for foreign languages as I had taken up German as a second language.

2003: I can never forget my 12th std board exams- they can be described in a word- bad! My Maths paper was very bad as I had joined a class where they didn’t teach anything! This was the year when I aspired being an architect and had appeared for all entrance exams in Pune. But after giving it a thought, changed my liking to Biotechnology. So after this decision, I landed back in Modern College doing my BSc. The year was fun as I participated in college plays and other activities. I made new friends and started liking the ‘other side’ of college.

2004: The second year of my senior college. This year is special to me because I met Amey. He was in my class in the first year too, but amongst the 200 students I had hardly noticed him. We became Chemistry practical partners and we so hated it. We used to argue with each other and hate being with each other. The year just flew away with some interesting moments such as our annual gathering where I danced and surprised all and our trip to Mahabaleshwar.

2005: The year was last year in college- which is always a senti one. The thought of leaving the college and friends always makes you shudder. This year for the first time we went for an overnight trip to Amboli- a very beautiful place in Konkan and had a great time. Of course, we hated that it was a Botany tour and we had to collect plant samples, even on the beach! The college, the parking lot, all the places we used to hang out, all the college festivals- I miss them all.

2006: Exams again….so boring. Passed, graduated, stood first. (Shabash :) now was the time to choose a profession- learning German further or joining mass communication. But when I became one of the University of Pune’s 30 short listed I decided to give it a shot. The year was full of the separation pain- my 3 magicals years in Modern doing BSc with fab friends were over- and I kinda didn’t like the Ranade (my mass comm. Dept was popularly known as Ranade Institute) setup. But the year went in making the student’s paper- Vritta Vidya, doing an internship in Maharashtra Herald and making merry with new friends from all over India. This year I went to Goa at a friends place and got a chance to ring in the New Year partying all night long.

2007: The year of growing up. We had the Bangalore trip- a very beautiful city and we visited Mysore- another beautiful city. This year I joined the Japanese classes and met a crazy bunch of people who became very good friends of mine. The Japanese song contest, which we won and our various expeditions around Pune were the highlights.

2008: The year if many things. The judaai ka gam with my Japanese friends. My not-so-good MA farewell party and campus selection in 2 companies! The excitement of doing a job in Mumbai and staying all alone and the sadness of leaving family and friends behind! They year I changed 2 places in Mumbai and learnt life’s lessons and enjoyed working in DNA.

2009: The year of changes and boredom. This year gave me a chance to meet celebrities- from Dev Anand to Leander Paes to Minissha Lamba. I went to some posh hotels- JW Marriot, Hyatt, Taj, Trident, ITC...I loved my job only at these times! ;) I stayed in the oh-so-posh area of Bandra and enjoyed jogging with stars- Nagma, Farhan Akhtar and so on (I saw them when I went to jog...thought I should clarify ;).
There was a stable period due to recession… hope that 2010 brings a lot more happiness and peace in everyone’s and my life. Hope some of my wishes are realized.

Time to say Goodbye Noughties and wishing you all a very Happy and Prosperous New Year 2010. Ciao.

Hostel-life

I always wanted to know how it feels staying in a hostel- and mind you, its one rollercoaster of an emotion! I have currently (yesterday) shifted to a hostel in Prabhadevi from the cozy flat in Bandra.

The hostel is no doubt very neat and clean, the Catholic institutes generally are. But the discipline and the punctuality are freakingly freaking! The other day, when I went to get admission to the hostel, the sister incharge handed me a paper full of instructions. Believe it or not, at every place in the hostel premises, there are small boards full of instructions. Eg: Near the bathroom- Do not wash your jeans here. Girls, if found washing will be fined.

We get dinner from 8pm to 9pm and breakfast from 7am to 8.15am (even on Saturday and Sunday!). There are different types of rooms- namely, the hostel rooms and the guest house rooms. Thankfully, I am staying at the guest house which has better privacy, space and 24*7 electricity supply (the girls in the hostel have to charge their mobiles in another common room!).

Yesterday, being the first day of my hostel life, gave me Goosebumps. But it wasn’t that bad as I had imagined. I will take some more time adjusting to the new surroundings and write a blog later on the same!

Deutsch it is....

Guten Tag! Wie geht es ihnen? Für lange habe ich kein blogpost geschrieben. So, hier ich komme!

Confused? Or thinking that I have become mad? The latter is more possible. ;)

But I haven’t gone mad (unfortunately :P). Anyways, I have just brushed up my German after two and a half years and joined the B1 Level course at the Max Mueller Bhavan. And you know what; it feels great being a student again.

The best thing about being a student (despite the fact being that I have paid my fees from my salary…no parents’ participation) is the fresh smell of books. The colourful cover page and interesting caricatures inside it, make me feel as if I am in school again.

In college, I would keep on cribbing about the long and boring lectures. But here the class being of four hour duration is not boring at all! The way we introduced ourselves to each other on the first day was very unique. First of all, we had to speak in German, compulsory and then we had to find out five commonalities between us and the other people and introduce based on these facts.

But a thing I dread being a student again are the exams! And we have not only one but three exams. But studying, group discussions, working together again after a long time will surely help. I miss my school and college days and this is a unique chance for me to get them back, what if only for a couple of months.

Tschüs then guys! Auf wiedersehen. (FYI: Babye ;)